Four Basic Hungers

From the moment of birth, we all have but two basic needs; to be fed and to be stroked.

According to Dr. Eric Berne, author of Games People Play, these needs can be categorized as four basic hungers;

• Physical Hunger

• Structure Hunger

• Stimulus Hunger

• Recognition Hunger

Physical hunger, in many cases, can be dealt with rather simply; you go somewhere and you get something to eat or you starve to death.  I realize this is not so simple for millions of people but I don't have the solution so I do what I can by donating to charities like Feed the Children and my local Food Bank.

Structure hunger demands that you do something to occupy your time lest you become bored.  "Boredom", according to Dr. Berne, "is synonymous with emotional starvation and can result in biological deterioration."  In other words you really can die from boredom. This hunger can be satisfied by taking part in an activity either solitarily or within a group.  Activities can be categorized as rituals (dating, working, going to church, going to school), pastimes (watching television, playing the guitar, drawing, playing baseball), games (flirting, cheating, politics), and intimacy (holding a baby, spending time with family, helping a close friend).

Stimulus hunger, like physical hunger, can be satisfied quite easily; you talk to someone, you touch someone, you listen to someone, you take a hot shower, you listen to music, etc.  This hunger can be satisfied through participation in activities by yourself or as part of a group.

Recognition hunger, unlike the other hungers, cannot be satisfied without the help of others.  You can pat yourself on the back but it's not as satisfying as having someone else (especially someone you respect) pat you on the back.  This powerful hunger can only be satisfied through social contact.  Social contact means participating in online activities like TWEETING, posting and commenting on FACEBOOK and INSTAGRAM, and posting and commenting on videos on YOUTUBE.  It also means participating in off-line activities which can result in positive and/or constructive feed back from others..

Dr. Berne mentions that the most gratifying forms of social contact are games (i.e., flirting, cheating, politics), and intimacy (i.e., holding a baby, spending time with family, helping a close friend). 

Two things to remember; Games often end in turmoil. Intimacy always result in harmony.

According to Dr. Berne, for most people, life is mainly a process of filling in time until the arrival of death.  Most people fail to rise above the programming of the past and are unable to be moved by a natural feeling (to act spontaneously) so they resort to games instead of intimacy.

Most people never realize that true intimacy is much more rewarding than playing games.

Isn't it time we stop playing games and fight for something worth fighting for? Our lives. Our families. Our futures.

About the Author  

RC Bonay is an engineer with a passion for writing and drawing. He started reading comic books at an early age and soon discovered he had a flair for telling stories of his own. As he grew, he dreamed of following in the footsteps of comic book legend, Stan Lee. His passion ebbed and his dream faded as it became necessary to pursue a more traditional lifestyle in order to raise his growing family. The dream was rekindled as the youngest of his four children blossomed into young adulthood. 

RC’s vision is best summed up by his mottos; 

“The world would be a better place if we all just learned to draw.” 

“Learn from the best, forget it all, and just write.”